Friday, November 21, 2008

Well, Hell.

I am in the rather unusual (for me anyway) position of having quite a bit to say.... and having no words.

Bare facts... My aunts and one of my uncles need to disappear. As in, into a hole that will never be found. As a matter of fact, as far as I'm concerned they are no longer related to me. I refuse to acknowledge grasping, bitter slimeballs like them. I've scraped better candidates for human beings off my boots after slipping into a stagnant pond.

Early this morning, a fire claimed the lives of three people back home. They were friends of the whole Farm Family, good people. I'm just... numb. Too much has happened, I just can't process all of it.

Old news for some people now, but Cowboy Mechanic and I are no longer together. He broke it off the night we brought grandpa home from the hospital. Yes, he knew what was going on. No, I don't really want to talk about it.

This morning, I participated in the show, and I still don't know what I scored, because I had to leave right after I did my pattern, to get ready for grandpa's funeral. Etta did really well, though, as far as I'm concerned. I rode for three hours this morning, before the show.

It was enough for Etta, but it wasn't enough for me.


Sean said...

I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather - and that you have been having a tough time of things. I hope it turns around soon miss.

Murphy said...

Thoughts and prayers, Famrgirl...

JPG said...

You have our deepest sympathies. Even when you know a terrible event is pending, one still must cope with the grief when it arrives.

It is doubly shocking when one encounters outright betrayal by those who SHOULD be a significant part of your support system. Scant comfort we may be, but please be aware of the prayers and good wishes offered up by your friends and family out on the 'Net.

All best wishes
JPG and Holly

CarolG said...

My sympathy and best wishes to you. I am so sorry you lost your grandfather. Take care of yourself and your loved ones. I wish I could offer more help during this difficult time.

knitalot3 said...

{{{Hugs}}}for you and your family.