Saturday, August 25, 2007

Testosterone/Estrogen poisoning.

I'm sure I've used the term testosterone poisoning before, and I just used estrogen poisoning over at AD's blog in a comment on his post about how he's not gonna turn into a totally sappy blog but might get sappy once in a while.

It just occurred to me that some of my readers might not understand these phrases, so I decided to explain them. If you knew them already, well, I hope you get a kick out of it anyway.

Testosterone Poisoning: 1. That condition in which a male does stupid things, simply because he is a male.
Some examples of this kind of testosterone poisoning include: Dumb bar fights, dumb shooting competitions, any contest or activity which begins with the phrase "hold my beer," and any activity, the idea for which originated somewhere in the bottom half of a bottle.

2. That condition in which a female is surrounded by males, smothered in testosterone, and then a) does something stupid herself, or b) gets fed up with all of them and goes to seek the company of women.

Estrogen Poisoning: 1. The condition of a male when he is acting somewhat "girly." This includes, but is not limited to, writing sappy poetry, crying during chick flicks, and giving his significant other nicknames such as "pooky," "schnookums," or "snuggle boo."

2. The technical description for the state of mind of a "tomboy" when she is fed up with being eyeball deep in the bull pucky of her own sex. This condition can cause her to use phrases such as: "Good God! Grow a set and get over it!" "What the hell is this? Fashion hour?!?" "Boo freaking hoo, you broke a nail, stop gluing big fake ones on and man up, you little pansy woman!"

So now you know.