To everyone who wanders away from their vehicle whilst waiting for the pilot car: Please, folks, do get out and stretch your legs. We don't mind a bit. We would, however, appreciate it if you wouldn't do so in the middle of the lane of traffic, and continue to stand there while the outgoing line of traffic is coming. Just a bad idea, people. Also... if you could either stay on the same side of the highway as your vehicle, or at least get *back* on the right side of the highway when you see traffic coming... that would be fabulous.
To the truckers who decide to take a nap: Guys... I know you run hard and you don't get as much sleep as you'd like. Neither do I. But I swear by whatever you care to name I'm going to start borrowing the first truck in line's CB and blowing an air horn in it if you guys don't get your act together, or at least leave a window rolled down so that the noise of traffic going by wakes you up.
To the trucker who broke down then verbally assaulted the female supervisor when she offered help: Yes. You had it under control. So did we. Hope you enjoyed your visit with two of our big 'ol country boys, and the Sheriff's deputy.
To the people who whine about the wait: Folks, its eight miles of road. The speed limit is 45. You're the same people who were whining about how bad the road was... guess what? We don't have a magic wand to wave and instantly fix everything. Guess what else? Your bitching isn't going to make that pilot car get back any sooner. Honest, I know. I drive it. Do yourself and everyone around you a big favor, sit back, take a breath and meditate on this fact: The only thing keeping us from holding you longer than we do, is a sense of common courtesy and professionalism. Even the best people let their vindictive side get the better of them now and then.
To the new (?) Highway Patrol Officer: I don't recognize you, so I'm figuring you're a new rookie they sent down here to train. Welcome to the area. That said, if you ever fly by the flagger on the end without so much as a by your leave and run onto the pilot line doing eighty again, I will personally chew your ass. The siren was a nice touch, by the way. What exactly did you expect me to do when you hit your whoop whoops? Lead traffic off the side of a bridge, or a full foot drop on the other side? You do realize, don't you, that while, when on the open highway, you have the right of way, in a construction zone, you do NOT. We get you guys through as fast as we can because you're trying to do your job, and we don't want to interfere with that. But, we can make you wait, no matter what the call is, until the pilot car gets there. Yes, we can, even if you're running hot. Courtesy goes both ways, Officer, not to mention the safety of the general public.
To the chicks who were checking T out: Number one... yes, he is easy on the eyes, and its not a crime to look. Just some advice though, if you're leaning against your car trying to act all cool, and look sexy.. don't wipe your nose using your entire forearm. You probably couldn't see it from where you were, but that one turned him green. Oh, and when he's talking to co workers who happen to be female? Don't keep talking louder to try and get his attention. That prompts him to mutter to his co workers to help him out here, which prompts much laughter, and waving of dollar bills.
It also encourages us to bet him a dollar he won't "adjust" himself while you're looking. (He did)
To the people who were patient and nice: Thank you so much for visiting and making the day go a little faster. You were a breath of fresh air and much appreciated by all of us who came in contact with you!
Thank you all for visiting us, to those of you who waved and smiled as you went by, have a nice day. To those of you who whined/flipped us off/acted like jerks.... Bite Me.