Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Credit to BabsRN

Yesterday I read a post over at BabsRN's blog about how guy friends rock.

I totally agree!

Apparently not everyone does, however, and some of the attitudes shown in the comments brought to mind some of the things that I've dealt with all my life, simply for being a "tomboy."

Yep. I am. Always have been.

When I was growing up, we spent a lot of time at my great grandmother's place, out in the country. Climbing trees and exploring pastures was always more fun than playing with dolls in the house.

My dad was also a police officer for ten years, and most of my memories from that time are from a town where most of the people he arrested on a regular basis were related to kids I was going to school with. It caused... friction. I learned to stand up for myself.

I've always related more to guys than to girls. With the exception of the other two of the Three Musketeers, my closest friends have all been guys.

And it has nothing to do with sex.

My guy friends have always been there for me. I've had guy friends who were just as available for me to cry on their shoulder over some jerk that broke my heart as to help me move heavy things.

Even though they were a little weirded out by the fact that I was in tears in the first place.

There is nothing in the world as comforting, when you're sixteen, as your guy friend awkwardly hugging you, and asking if you want him to go kick the guy's ass.

The healing process begins with the phrase "If I wanted his ass kicked I'd do it myself!"

The thing that some people don't seem to get though... I don't hang out with a bunch of guys because I like being the only female in the group, or for some twisted self esteem issue.

I hang out with guys 'cause they're more fun!

Very, very few women will suggest taking a .22 out and killing something as a stress release.

(*disclaimer: I realize that many women in the blogosphere would in fact do so, I'm talking about the women and girls that I have contact with here in my area.)

Not many women will look at a crazy hair dye job courtesy of your best friend and understand that its not about trends or fashion, but about having PURPLE hair.

And no women that I know would get a little tipsy and cook up a "brotherhood" plot of shaving their heads, and allowing people to film it.

Some of my guy friends should not be bald.

I simply cannot understand women who can't have an interpersonal relationship with a man without it being about sex, in some way or another.

Or the ones that think that *I* can't.

I don't need your issues, ladies. There is a small chance that you might be right, and a few of my guy friends might have once been interested in getting into my pants. A few of my guy friends have made it clear that if I ever got the inclination they'd jump on the opportunity... but ya know what? They don't push.

They value the *friendship.* Just as I do.

Thats another thing I've seen in girls, and I do mean girls and not women, although there's probably some of it there too...

Girls... when a guy says he wants to be friends, that is not code for keep hitting on me until I get drunk and give in. This will not result in a relationship. More likely, it will result in his friends, male and female, finding you annoying. And, if he does give up and sleep with you, it will result in his friends smacking him upside the head and calling him an idiot.

Just my take on things... probably not entirely coherent, I'm not completely caffeinated yet, but its the best I got, for the moment.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Farmgirl, You're reminding me of my sister when we were growing up. She always had more friends who were guys too. In high school, she was the one that got all the dirty looks from the other girls. She's four years younger than me. She learned to shoot at the same time I did and she learned to shoot about as well as me... sometimes better. We used to fish together a lot too... time was, she was mad if she didn't get to go. Not nearly the whole story though.

mustanger

Anonymous said...

I just remembered an article I found about narcissism. With a situation I've been dealing with for the last 10 years in my community, I thought this explained a whole lot of why things are the way they are.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissism

This might explain why some guys and some women/girls do the way they do. There's a whole lot of competition involved... mostly just "me, me, me...".

mustanger, again.

Anonymous said...

Well, I (me, me, me! :P ) think that you rock, girl. Sex or not, you're one of the first and few women who I truly value and *RESPECT*.. which doesn't come easy or cheap. (you're like.. eh.. one of three, the two others being my "sisters"?) I think looking at someone as human and falliable instead of a goddess or a piece of sex-meat changes matters, too, which is something both sexes are guilty of..

so be a tomboy, or as feminine as you like, I don't care, I think you're awesome both ways, or whatnot.. and if you need dressing room security at your wedding, let me know. Nobody gets past, boss. :P

-J

farmgirl said...

Mmmhmm, Josh, and the reverse peephole you install will be purely for security reasons, I assume? :P

DW said...

God, I think I want to adopt you! I wish my step daughters had half your guts, brains or what ever. You are a girl and a woman and probably (hopefully) more trouble than youre worth. But you make SENCE.

farmgirl said...

I make sense?? Since when?!?