A New One On Me

The other day at work, while I was working the twenty items or less aisle, at the far end of the store, I was bored out of my mind. Mostly because I was the absolute last register in the line as far from the "busy" end of the store as you can get. So, I was doing what I was told to do, standing in front of my register aisle and looking for customers to help, whether they had twenty items or a hundred and twenty.

This guy comes by, I give him the smile and "I can take care of you right here if you're ready," and he starts unloading his cart.

This is when I begin to suspect that this guy might not be right in the head. Lots of four packs of toilet paper, tons of vitamins, potted meats, and fruit. As I start scanning and bagging this dude starts telling me how he's stocking up for TEOTWAWKI. I'm thinking standard Last Man On Earth economy collapsing survivalist nutbag, but no, he threw a curveball at me.

See, there's this rogue planet, which will come between the Earth and the sun for three days sometime in September, causing a three day eclipse, flipping the planet, electromagnetic fields wiping out the electrical grid and all of modern technology.

Apparently, this is what wiped out the ancient Sumerians, and they documented everything leading up to it, which matches all the stuff going on now with the weird weather and volcanoes and earthquakes.

I got the whoooole story, and it stretched my ability to remain polite. I was able to act mildly interested because I hadn't heard this particular delusion before, but the guy in line behind this dude developed a decided cough at certain points.

This is my world now.... someone help me.